Focusing on the Task at Hand

Thanks to my husband, I recently had the opportunity to attend a running clinic sponsored by Runner's World Magazine.  Jack Daniels, one of the most well-known and well-respected running coaches in the US, shared from the wealth of running wisdom that he's accumulated over the years.  You can read more about his visit here and here.

I've used some advice from Jack Daniels before, so I was eager to know what he would share with us.  After hearing from him, I want to focus more on my stride rate (to run efficiently, we're to shoot for 180 steps per minute) and my breathing (running at a good pace should result in a breath in over 2 steps and a breath out over 2 steps).  And I want to learn to focus on the task at hand.  This seems very simple, but in a racing situation, and especially in a marathon, it's very easy to get overwhelmed and to fixate on how far I am from the finish.  The distance and time remaining can feel burdensome, crushing, even impossible.

This concept was echoed in a youtube clip showing highlights from this week's LA marathon and an interview with a female runner named Amy Hastings.  Her first marathon, she finished in second place with a phenomenal time under less-than-ideal weather conditions.  She said that she experienced pain different from anything she's never felt before, but that when it came to pushing through and finishing, she began to focus on getting through each quarter mile and then each mile.  Great advice for finishing a running marathon, but also valuable for finishing life's other "marathons" too.

Note to self

Today, Dave and I celebrate our eighth wedding anniversary!  Sometimes, I wish I could go back in time and give some advice to my younger self; I want to tell her how it really is.

One of the things I would tell younger Lori is that marriage is a lot like running a marathon. 

Surrounded by a crowd of friends and family, you make promises, celebrate the new thing that is about to happen, and then you're pronounced husband and wife.  And you're off.  The race has begun.  You have lots of people happy for you and cheering you on, at least in the beginning.  Everything feels new and fresh.  Your feet don't hurt, and you're not impacted by the weather.  You're ready to take on whatever hill or cramp or hardship may come your way.  You're in the honeymoon phase.  There's no fighting.  Nothing can get you down.

After you've been at it for a while, some old injuries and hurts begin to resurface, affecting your attitude and running and relating.  You plow through the pain and discouragement.  But then you feel thirsty and hungry, at least until you reach the next water stop, where you are blessed and refreshed for a time with gatorade and power bars.  Next come obstacles with names Loneliness, Boredom, and Distraction.  And then you hit the wall, where you are tested to see how much you want this race or this marriage.

You almost always start a marathon expecting to make it to the finish line, but sometimes, things don't go as planned, and the race ends in an unexpected way.  You choose to give up, or the race ends early due to a medical condition, or a betrayal, or death.

But there are blessings along the way.  An unexpected conversation...a new friendship forms as the miles tick by.  A friend cheers or speaks words of honesty or prays for you at just the right time.  Or you're having an "on" running day...the miles fly by and you're feeling great...things seem effortless for a time.  You're feeling strong and that you have what you need to keep at it.  And you see the finish line in this distance and remember that all of the hard work and difficult choices impact more than just you; it's worth it for your kids and sometimes even for people you've never met.  Your choices and relationships can affect people in a different time and place.

When I think of marriage, one of the things that I remember is some wise advice that the mother of a very dear friend of mine gave to my friend as she was making some decisions about dating and marriage.  She encouraged my friend to "run" as quickly as she could toward Jesus and then look to see who was running with her to determine who would make a good husband.  Today, I'm feeling so very grateful to be running this race with Dave.  I hope we're running an ultra-marathon.  Happy anniversary David!  I love you!

(The photo is me in my wedding gown running down the steps of the church where we were married.  I even had running shoes on!  The photo was not taken on our wedding day;  Dave shot this in May 2009 for a school project.  We got some interesting and confused looks from neighbors that day!)

Dave is my hero!

My husband was my inspiration for my first marathon.  Dave ran the Philadelphia Marathon in 2008.  I remember The Conversation.  One spring morning in 2008, very shortly after my daughter was born (so I was exhausted, hormonal, overweight, and desperately in need of excuses to get out of the house kid-free), Dave informed me that he had decided that he wanted to train to run a marathon.  At the time, he hadn't gone for a run in years.  I was shocked.  I think I may have cried when he told me.  I was not very supportive.  I was jealous.  After-all, running a marathon was MY life goal, and one that I had not yet achieved.

I remember the transformation that took place in him over the following several months.  He lost 30 pounds.  He gained confidence as he tried something new and struggled and overcame and improved.  He even started waking up early for morning runs (and Dave is not a morning person).  He became disciplined where he was undisciplined for the sake of reaching his goal.

Before we knew it, it was the morning of November 23, 2008, and the race was about to start.  Dave would be put to the test...would his hundreds of hours and thousands of miles of training be enough?  Was the training a worthy investment of his energy?  Dave put on his running clothes, drank some coffee and water, downed a bagel, and jogged to the race start.  I remember seeing him at several points along the course, cold and tired, but brave, and having fun as usual (see video below!).



Seeing others strive to achieve the unattainable and ambitious suddenly makes that impossible goal possible for us.  It empowers us to try new things.  It reminds of dreams we once had or places a mirror in front of us to keep us accountable to the things we said we hoped to accomplish.  It helps us to have the courage to put ourselves out there...to grow and to change.

I'm grateful to be married to someone who did (and does) this for me.  Very shortly after completing his marathon, Dave encouraged me to sign up for a half marathon.  I followed through, and in the process, rediscovered my love for running.  Next, I finally registered for and completed that marathon.

Dave's inspiration for his first marathon were two friends, John, his best friend from college, and Rob, a mentor and coworker.  Who inspires you today?  How can you encourage others with your bold actions?